As anyone who knows me knows, I do not give up that easily! As ridiculous as this sounds, my husband told me I wasn't passionate enough-sexually, and as a last ditch effort, I tried to show him my true lust and passion. We had hot, steamy, shower sex- and you know what? The next morning he said to me "You know this doesn't change anything"! Mother F'er! Later that day I told him if he felt that strongly about "Bambi" (close to her real name by the way) he should probably go move in with her. I just didn't think it would be the next week!
As the final day approached, I said to him, "Do I want you to leave, NO, but I am NOT going to stop you if this is truly what you want; However, I will wear my ring today, and if you are wearing yours' when I get home, I will take it as a sign of hope, if not, then I will know for sure it is over for good...but I will always love you in my heart forever..."
So, no real surprise, I arrived home from work and he was NOT wearing his ring. A feeling of cold numbness ran through my veins. Another part of me died that day... I left him this note:
"Ok, you gave me no sign, I've poured out my heart, gave you every possible chance to change your mind, yet you still turn down my love (and sex)-so I guess I've said everything I want to say, and still you want to walk away from everything you love-because of me...that hurts, but I won't waste anymore of your time, or my breath on you. You are FREE to go do anything you choose; It just won't include me. Like I said before, I love you too much to just be your friend -it will be easier that way...I'm sorry it has to be that way -it just does...I can't help you mourne over me. If your not going to be a part of my life-I have to go live mine..."
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