Wow, how do I start to write the beginning of the end of this blog??? Well, if you look back to my first post, it was the day before summer started, so I thought it would be appropriate to end it the day before summer ends, and fall officially starts. I can't really say it flew by, because so much has happened in the last three months, it almost seems like an eternity in some ways; In other ways it felt like an out of body experience, and that I just woke up from a dream, like Alice in Wonderland; Who are all these characters and where was I?
So, let's take a minute to recap what's happened. As of today's actual date, it's been 145 days since my husband of 15 years left me to move in with Bambi, but who's counting! It put me on an emotional rollercoaster like I had never been before. I mourned like there had been a death in the family. I had good days and I had bad ones. Music became my companion and inspiration to get me through the day; Writing became my tool to survive, my therapy. Without the combination of both, I'm not sure I could have made it this far, this fast. I'm not sure I meant for my life to become a social experiment of self-exploration, but it did, and I brought a lot of people along for the ride, including you...
My thesis began to take shape accidently. I was sad, lonly, bored, and in an altered mental state. Some of the things I did, even as I'm writing this, I can't believe really happened- and it's all true, even tamed down to avoid to much TMI!!! I drank too much, smoked too much, I didn't sleep enough, and I even ALMOST got arrested for a DUI, but even the officer felt bad for me, and drove me home when I told him my plight. Although I sobbed, and fell on my face in my own driveway! (God must have been looking out for me that night).
All along, the great thing was, that I had super supportive friends and family, (if you don't include my brother). One thing I did, was to take the advice of one of my best guy friends from California; He said the best way to get over someone, was to get under someone else! I took his advice literally and ran with it! I think maybe I thought I could learn to think like a guy, or at least understand them better. I'm not sure I even came close to that, but I did learn a few things about men. The main thing I learned is that guys in their 20's, and guys in their 30's and up, are worlds apart in the current generation gap. I'm not even sure guys in their 20's even want a real girl, but rather an avatar they create! They want sex, but not real sex. They take safe sex to the next level. They don't even really want to talk, less even than all men already do! They want to talk dirty, but only with a keypad, and they want to see you naked, but only in picture form, and yes, they want to cum, but you know how they take care of that! Oh, and they would gladly send you a video of that too, weather or not it's requested! I don't think they get that women don't get off on that as much as they do. On the other hand, guys in their 30's and up have come a long way in their texting, sexting, Facebooking, IMing, & Skyping, etc.; But when it comes down to it, they still want to get laid, and will actually pick up the phone and call you when they want to do so, the rest of it is to appease them in between actual sex! So, what we learned here ladies, is what we already knew- that guys think with their dick, they just go about it in different ways!
Now for my personal recap; Humm, where to begin and where to end...This blog hasn't exactly helped my love life, I'm still single, but, as my family and friends remind me, I should be, because it's only been 5 months since my husband and I broke up, and I should be having fun and enjoying myself, just be safe and smart about it. I've actually had at least 3 or 4 girlfriends tell me they have been living vicariously through me! I'm flattered they find my life so exciting. I have had a lot of fun, and some great lifelong memories. Oh, the stories I will have to tell when I am old! I got to booty dance with my 23 year old teenage dream, make love out of town to my 27 year old sexting lover; And I met two really great guys, who both have a lot of relationship potential. They are part of the reason I am ending this blog tonight. I have personally come as far as I can with this, and they don't need or deserve to read about my sexual escapades with them or anyone else. All men probably want to believe we girls are all at home waiting for them, even if the're out screwing someone else every other night, until they put a ring on it! Men have not progressed as much into the 21th Century as woman have! LOL
Anyway, if you read all the blog, you know I have much stronger feelings for one of these guys. However, my friends feel I have never given the other guy a real chance, and some are even betting that I'll end up with him! So, maybe I need to re-evaluate the situation. Hey, even girls have a weeding out process too! I havn't "been with" either of these guys in almost 2 months, but I still talk to them both. I definitly want my 80's John Cusack "Say Anything" moment, but in the 21th Century, I'll settle for a Facebook dedication and a relationship status change! LMAO
So only time will tell, but whatever happens, it will be between me and him from now on, you will be left in the dark, only to guess what happens next...
P.S. If this was truly a thesis I'm sure I would get an "A". Bahaha
Love and kisses
CC
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Dirty Dancing-"I Had the Time of My Life"
It continues to amaze me at how everything in my story/my life has become full circle. My long summer love story ends as it all began, innocently. My longtime friend Jillian really wanted to go out dancing, but like usual I had worked all day, and already had tenetive plans.
At work, we found out that Gooses' stepdad had been admitted to the hospital, and of course I told her I would go if she needed me to. On the other hand, my son was spending the night with Bunnis' son, and they were taking the kids with them to country music night and a friends house. They urged me to go along too. I had to drive to Bunnis' house anyway, and almost went... While I was at Bunnis' I got a call from Goose letting me know everything was ok, and that she was already home from the hospital. Then, I got another call from Jillian, who only lives two streets away from Bunni. She reminded me that I hate country music and should go dancing with her, so I caved in! So, I picked up Jillian and we were on the way. Oh, I almost forgot, I also had tentive plans to meet Martin out, and texted him with our destination when it was finally set! (Even though it changed again, because we got a text from Jillians' friend that the new place we were going to go to sucked, and we decided to go to the usual place!) LOL
So at last we arrived. Jillian and I walkd over to say hi to her friend the DJ. She introduced us, and he asked what we were drinking, (vodka and cranberry of course), and he signaled to the barteneder who comped us a drink. Nice way to start the night, even though Bunni had given me some frozen concoction called a Painkiller earlier in the evening. We chilled outside for a while and scoped out the scenery. There was a super hot looking guy sitting all alone at the bar. I offered considerately to Jillian to go to the bar to get our next round of drinks! LOL I casually said hi to check him out, but he seemed more interested in his beer.
Next we decided it was time to dance. We went inside, and the problem was, there were very few people om the dance floor, just a couple of girls. I said to Jillian, "no problem, let's get this party started"! She followed me out and we started to shake it. Not more than 5 minutes later the floor was packed. I said, "I told you so". A hot young blond girl named Savannah, came up to me and told me she loved my dancing and when she has a few more drinks she would be out there to join me! The next thing I know, I see a young guy who looks just like my "hot guy from work". Then his group is dancing right next to us, and holy shit, it is him! First we ignore each other, then we headed outside for a smoke, and one of the girls in his group comes over to us to bum one. I ask her if she is on a date with my hot guy, and she says, "No, a friend of a friend", and proceeds to call him over. He says hi to me by name, and gives me a big hug, which made my night, because we have never touched before. Just then Martin arrives, what timing! He comes over to say "hi", and asks me if I got his text that he was on the way. I told him "no, I was dancing", which was true. He disappeared, and we went back to dancing. I saw Martin a few times throughout the night and even talked to him near the dance floor.
Later, Savannah, the girl from earlier, was now drunk enough to dance. She asked me to dance with her and her friends, another girl and two guys. They girls were all up on me, it was so funny. I looked at my hot guy and just laughed. I ended up dancing with hot guys girls next. He came out to the dance floor, pretty buzzed by now, and danced between us all. Next thing I know he is in front of me and my arm is around him. Jillian pointed out that we were backwards and he got behind me and started to grind up on me. OMG! My fantasy boy toy was booty dancing with me! I looked at my watch because it was almost closing time. He pushed my arm down, and said not to look at the time, but I knew it was almost over, like Cinderella's ball. He also told me that night that he was moving away, but I now had my special moment for life with him, a memory I'll cherish forever, of the first person to help me grieve over the loss of the love of my life, my husband...
Martin left and just told Jillian to tell me goodbye, that he was heading home. Savannaha's group all gave me a hug goodbye, and my hot guys group ushered him out the door because he was pretty drunk, as for Jillian and I, we headed home, alone. Actually, I went back to Bunni's house to crash because it was so close to Jillians'. I was actually the first one back, and after raiding the frig and having one last smoke, I took her dog and cat with me, and went to crash out in one of her son's rooms who was away! When I woke up in the morning, I had missed a text from my country boy Josh, asking, "You up?" So, till next time...Peace and love...xoxo CC
At work, we found out that Gooses' stepdad had been admitted to the hospital, and of course I told her I would go if she needed me to. On the other hand, my son was spending the night with Bunnis' son, and they were taking the kids with them to country music night and a friends house. They urged me to go along too. I had to drive to Bunnis' house anyway, and almost went... While I was at Bunnis' I got a call from Goose letting me know everything was ok, and that she was already home from the hospital. Then, I got another call from Jillian, who only lives two streets away from Bunni. She reminded me that I hate country music and should go dancing with her, so I caved in! So, I picked up Jillian and we were on the way. Oh, I almost forgot, I also had tentive plans to meet Martin out, and texted him with our destination when it was finally set! (Even though it changed again, because we got a text from Jillians' friend that the new place we were going to go to sucked, and we decided to go to the usual place!) LOL
So at last we arrived. Jillian and I walkd over to say hi to her friend the DJ. She introduced us, and he asked what we were drinking, (vodka and cranberry of course), and he signaled to the barteneder who comped us a drink. Nice way to start the night, even though Bunni had given me some frozen concoction called a Painkiller earlier in the evening. We chilled outside for a while and scoped out the scenery. There was a super hot looking guy sitting all alone at the bar. I offered considerately to Jillian to go to the bar to get our next round of drinks! LOL I casually said hi to check him out, but he seemed more interested in his beer.
Next we decided it was time to dance. We went inside, and the problem was, there were very few people om the dance floor, just a couple of girls. I said to Jillian, "no problem, let's get this party started"! She followed me out and we started to shake it. Not more than 5 minutes later the floor was packed. I said, "I told you so". A hot young blond girl named Savannah, came up to me and told me she loved my dancing and when she has a few more drinks she would be out there to join me! The next thing I know, I see a young guy who looks just like my "hot guy from work". Then his group is dancing right next to us, and holy shit, it is him! First we ignore each other, then we headed outside for a smoke, and one of the girls in his group comes over to us to bum one. I ask her if she is on a date with my hot guy, and she says, "No, a friend of a friend", and proceeds to call him over. He says hi to me by name, and gives me a big hug, which made my night, because we have never touched before. Just then Martin arrives, what timing! He comes over to say "hi", and asks me if I got his text that he was on the way. I told him "no, I was dancing", which was true. He disappeared, and we went back to dancing. I saw Martin a few times throughout the night and even talked to him near the dance floor.
Later, Savannah, the girl from earlier, was now drunk enough to dance. She asked me to dance with her and her friends, another girl and two guys. They girls were all up on me, it was so funny. I looked at my hot guy and just laughed. I ended up dancing with hot guys girls next. He came out to the dance floor, pretty buzzed by now, and danced between us all. Next thing I know he is in front of me and my arm is around him. Jillian pointed out that we were backwards and he got behind me and started to grind up on me. OMG! My fantasy boy toy was booty dancing with me! I looked at my watch because it was almost closing time. He pushed my arm down, and said not to look at the time, but I knew it was almost over, like Cinderella's ball. He also told me that night that he was moving away, but I now had my special moment for life with him, a memory I'll cherish forever, of the first person to help me grieve over the loss of the love of my life, my husband...
Martin left and just told Jillian to tell me goodbye, that he was heading home. Savannaha's group all gave me a hug goodbye, and my hot guys group ushered him out the door because he was pretty drunk, as for Jillian and I, we headed home, alone. Actually, I went back to Bunni's house to crash because it was so close to Jillians'. I was actually the first one back, and after raiding the frig and having one last smoke, I took her dog and cat with me, and went to crash out in one of her son's rooms who was away! When I woke up in the morning, I had missed a text from my country boy Josh, asking, "You up?" So, till next time...Peace and love...xoxo CC
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Real Sex- Take 1
So, where do I begin? If you read the earlier part of my story, you would know that I had a 27 year old sexting buddy named Josh. We were pretty hot and heavy- on the phone! He helped me safely explore my sexuality in ways that I never had before; But he was only a picture, a voice, and a text. I had never really met him, but I cared a lot about him because we had talked about our kids and lives. Josh had gotten into a "real" relationship with a real live girl. I was heartbroken, and knew our texting relationship had to end; So it did...
Several months later, I texted him to say, "Hi, how the hell have you been"? He told me he had broken up with his girlfriend, and it started all over again! However, this time it was different. I told him I couldn't do this again without knowing the real him. I had to meet him, I had to know the real Josh, just for me. I couldn't go through life and not know who he really was, no matter what the outcome was. Now, I know this was a risk, because we had the perfect "fake" relationship. He was my baby, and I was his hunni, with an "I". :) He was my country boy and I was his city girl. I told him that I would come to see him on my vacation, but then I told him that I couldn't wait that long- I had to meet him ASAP! So, on a Saturday, a day that I worked all day, and was supposed to attend a friends' house warming party, I decided to make the 2 1/2hr trip to meet him! I had told him I didn't care if we fell in love, or if it was just one night, that I had to know...It was just something I had to do!
I stopped by my BFFs' house warming party on the way. (She reads my blog and wished me well on my quest to find love again, and even gave me a box of condoms!) LMAO! I got back on the interstate and was on my way again. Josh and I texted the whole way there. It seemed like an eternity! I listened to CD's and smoked, due to nervousness, between texts!
When I arrived at his exit I called him and we talked as he guided me the rest of the way to his house. When I pulled into his driveway I paused for a minute to gain my composure. He met me on his porch, and there we were...two strangers who already knew each other intimately. We said, "Hi", "Hi", and smoked a cigarette before heading inside. He had a football game on, and only a pair of pajama pants! It was about 11:30pm. We kissed hello and I cuddled into his arms. He had piercings and a tatoo across his chest; Strange for a country boy I do admit, but all the more exciting! I ran my hand across his tatoo, and kissed his ear, neck and chest. No, I didn't waste much time, but it was late, and we were tired, and I didn't go all the way there to sleep! We went to his room soon after and "did it"! We slept cuddled in each others arms for the rest of the night. In the morning we did it once again. Then we drank coffee and hung out on the porch and talked. I smoked more than usual delaying my departure time. I sat close to him, not really wanting to go yet, but I knew it would soon be time. I knew what I had come to find out...I had found a friend, but not true love, but I was so glad I went; It meant a lot to me to know the real him. I hope we are friends forever...no regrets, no remorse; Only a smile, a happy memory...
He walked me to the car, and we hugged and gave each other a little kiss goodbye. The long ride home went good. I texted him once during the drive and then once again when I arrived back. I think it totally changed the fantasy/dynamic, but it was real, and reality is important. So, for now, real sex, that's a wrap...
Several months later, I texted him to say, "Hi, how the hell have you been"? He told me he had broken up with his girlfriend, and it started all over again! However, this time it was different. I told him I couldn't do this again without knowing the real him. I had to meet him, I had to know the real Josh, just for me. I couldn't go through life and not know who he really was, no matter what the outcome was. Now, I know this was a risk, because we had the perfect "fake" relationship. He was my baby, and I was his hunni, with an "I". :) He was my country boy and I was his city girl. I told him that I would come to see him on my vacation, but then I told him that I couldn't wait that long- I had to meet him ASAP! So, on a Saturday, a day that I worked all day, and was supposed to attend a friends' house warming party, I decided to make the 2 1/2hr trip to meet him! I had told him I didn't care if we fell in love, or if it was just one night, that I had to know...It was just something I had to do!
I stopped by my BFFs' house warming party on the way. (She reads my blog and wished me well on my quest to find love again, and even gave me a box of condoms!) LMAO! I got back on the interstate and was on my way again. Josh and I texted the whole way there. It seemed like an eternity! I listened to CD's and smoked, due to nervousness, between texts!
When I arrived at his exit I called him and we talked as he guided me the rest of the way to his house. When I pulled into his driveway I paused for a minute to gain my composure. He met me on his porch, and there we were...two strangers who already knew each other intimately. We said, "Hi", "Hi", and smoked a cigarette before heading inside. He had a football game on, and only a pair of pajama pants! It was about 11:30pm. We kissed hello and I cuddled into his arms. He had piercings and a tatoo across his chest; Strange for a country boy I do admit, but all the more exciting! I ran my hand across his tatoo, and kissed his ear, neck and chest. No, I didn't waste much time, but it was late, and we were tired, and I didn't go all the way there to sleep! We went to his room soon after and "did it"! We slept cuddled in each others arms for the rest of the night. In the morning we did it once again. Then we drank coffee and hung out on the porch and talked. I smoked more than usual delaying my departure time. I sat close to him, not really wanting to go yet, but I knew it would soon be time. I knew what I had come to find out...I had found a friend, but not true love, but I was so glad I went; It meant a lot to me to know the real him. I hope we are friends forever...no regrets, no remorse; Only a smile, a happy memory...
He walked me to the car, and we hugged and gave each other a little kiss goodbye. The long ride home went good. I texted him once during the drive and then once again when I arrived back. I think it totally changed the fantasy/dynamic, but it was real, and reality is important. So, for now, real sex, that's a wrap...
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Party in the Penthouse!
Earlier in the week Jan invited T, Goose, and I to a dinner party at her pad. We all said yes, of course. I was told she had a beautiful condo on the intercostal. It sounded like a perfect girls night! The only problem I had was the fact it was only about 15minutes from the bar Steven owned...
So, like usual, I worked all day, then went to pick up Goose at her place. We chit chatted about this and that on the 30 minute or so drive there. When we arrived, we had to go through a guard gate that required us to provide ID. We were given direction to the building, and T met us outside for a smoke. We walked to the building and took the elevator to the Penthouse floor. Jan greeted us at the door and invited us in. Her place was stunning! Everything was perfect, just like a model unit. Her sunroom wall was a huge hurricane proof sliding glass door overlooking the intercostal and the bridge.
Jan was the perfect hostess. She offered us drinks as soon as we got settled. She made me a strong margarita. ( I actually had to ask for more mix, which she did not just add, she re-shook it!) Goose chose white wine, T a mixed drink, and Jan sipped a martini. She provided hors d'oeuvres, of course and looked beautiful in a long, loose, summer flowing dress, fitted up top, with her blond hair brushing across her shoulders. I joked if she needed a roommate, I would be happy to move in! (She was also recently seperated from her husband, like myself).
A little later she made me a second margarita, as well as the other girls a drink too. We all sat in the sunroom chatting, which soon turned to girl talk and laughter as we all loosened up! We spilled secrets and shared pics as we got our buzz on!
A little while later Jan informed us that dinner was ready and we all converged at the dining room table. The other girls were all drinking wine now, and I thought I should switch over too! Jan poured me a large glass of white. We ate and talked. Dinner was delicious. Afterwards, T and I offered to take Jan's little white dog out for a walk so we could sneak a smoke. We headed down the elevator to the walkway around the pond. I was pretty buzzed now... When we got back up to her unit I asked if they wanted to go with me to Stevens bar. They said they were content to stay there. I asked if they minded if I left for awhile. They were buzzed too and dancing now, and just said to be careful! I assured them I would be back in a couple of hours. I texted Steven on the way to let him know that I was coming to say "Hi".
When I got to the bar, I walked in and slid into a seat next to a mafia type looking guy with his girl sitting on his lap! I quickly chatted with her, and we hit it off. The bartender, wearing a bikini, came over to me, smiled and got me a drink. Steven and I saw each other across the bar and smiled. He looked hotter to me than ever. Just sooo sexy in his fitted cap and jeans! He came over to say hi and make some small talk. The place was smoky and loud music played; I tapped my fingers along to the beat of the music on the bar. The bikini bartender soon got me another drink (a stong one) and then one more too before closing! She was really sweet to me! Soon it was 2am and time to go. I asked Steven to walk me to my car, which he did. We hugged goodnight, and he sent me on my way, which was a good thing, caus I would have probably done him right there in the parking lot at that point! Haha LOL...
Goose texted me, "Where the hell r u"? I called her to let her know that I was on the way back. I don't know how I made it back through the guard gate, to the building, up the elevator, and back inside, (and managed to text Steven to let him know I was back), before passing out on Jan's leather couch! I woke up in a cold sweat and went to puke in Jan's perfect bathroom! Damm! Some people never learn!
Goose was gone, pissed at me again, I'm sure! (But hey, I've put up with a lot of her drunken shit in the past!) She'll get over it...and I really wanted her to meet Steven; She should've come with me! Maybe next time! LOL...:)
So, like usual, I worked all day, then went to pick up Goose at her place. We chit chatted about this and that on the 30 minute or so drive there. When we arrived, we had to go through a guard gate that required us to provide ID. We were given direction to the building, and T met us outside for a smoke. We walked to the building and took the elevator to the Penthouse floor. Jan greeted us at the door and invited us in. Her place was stunning! Everything was perfect, just like a model unit. Her sunroom wall was a huge hurricane proof sliding glass door overlooking the intercostal and the bridge.
Jan was the perfect hostess. She offered us drinks as soon as we got settled. She made me a strong margarita. ( I actually had to ask for more mix, which she did not just add, she re-shook it!) Goose chose white wine, T a mixed drink, and Jan sipped a martini. She provided hors d'oeuvres, of course and looked beautiful in a long, loose, summer flowing dress, fitted up top, with her blond hair brushing across her shoulders. I joked if she needed a roommate, I would be happy to move in! (She was also recently seperated from her husband, like myself).
A little later she made me a second margarita, as well as the other girls a drink too. We all sat in the sunroom chatting, which soon turned to girl talk and laughter as we all loosened up! We spilled secrets and shared pics as we got our buzz on!
A little while later Jan informed us that dinner was ready and we all converged at the dining room table. The other girls were all drinking wine now, and I thought I should switch over too! Jan poured me a large glass of white. We ate and talked. Dinner was delicious. Afterwards, T and I offered to take Jan's little white dog out for a walk so we could sneak a smoke. We headed down the elevator to the walkway around the pond. I was pretty buzzed now... When we got back up to her unit I asked if they wanted to go with me to Stevens bar. They said they were content to stay there. I asked if they minded if I left for awhile. They were buzzed too and dancing now, and just said to be careful! I assured them I would be back in a couple of hours. I texted Steven on the way to let him know that I was coming to say "Hi".
When I got to the bar, I walked in and slid into a seat next to a mafia type looking guy with his girl sitting on his lap! I quickly chatted with her, and we hit it off. The bartender, wearing a bikini, came over to me, smiled and got me a drink. Steven and I saw each other across the bar and smiled. He looked hotter to me than ever. Just sooo sexy in his fitted cap and jeans! He came over to say hi and make some small talk. The place was smoky and loud music played; I tapped my fingers along to the beat of the music on the bar. The bikini bartender soon got me another drink (a stong one) and then one more too before closing! She was really sweet to me! Soon it was 2am and time to go. I asked Steven to walk me to my car, which he did. We hugged goodnight, and he sent me on my way, which was a good thing, caus I would have probably done him right there in the parking lot at that point! Haha LOL...
Goose texted me, "Where the hell r u"? I called her to let her know that I was on the way back. I don't know how I made it back through the guard gate, to the building, up the elevator, and back inside, (and managed to text Steven to let him know I was back), before passing out on Jan's leather couch! I woke up in a cold sweat and went to puke in Jan's perfect bathroom! Damm! Some people never learn!
Goose was gone, pissed at me again, I'm sure! (But hey, I've put up with a lot of her drunken shit in the past!) She'll get over it...and I really wanted her to meet Steven; She should've come with me! Maybe next time! LOL...:)
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Why You SHOULD Sometimes Have SEX on the First Date!!!
Now this is just a personal option- not based on any facts or surveys; Nor am I an expert on the subject! LOL: But this is why I believe you should sometimes have sex on the first date, contrary to popular belief! First of all, people know whether or not they have that initial animal attraction; You either have it, or you don't, that simple. So why wait till the 2nd or 3rd date if your just gonna do it anyway. (Now if you're saving yourself for marriage or some other religious reason, then that is a different story). But, for most people, you're just trying to be on your best behavior, not look too easy, or are playing hard to get. But why? If you're gonna fuck anyway- why wait? You know you want to...
Also, if you "do it" the first night you're not going to give too much thought about it. It's going to be raw and real- you know what you're getting! Now, if you wait, you have too much time to think about it. You're going to have preconceived notions about how it should be, where it should be, what you're going to wear, how you should do it, what you shouldn't do, are you too fat, too skinny, not in good enough shape, do you like him/her enough, or should you even do it at all! See what I'm saying? It's probably not going to be as good as if you would have just done it! So like Nike says-"Just Do It"!
And guys, don't be so quick to judge! Be happy you found a girl you're attracted to, and she actually wants you!!! That doesn't make her a slut or ho; She's no different than you. Girls want and need sex too!
My mom gave me the best advice, she said, "Be a lady in the street and a whore in the bedroom- and your man will be happy." :) So, be safe, have fun and happy dating. Hope you find the man or woman of your dreams, your soulmate, the love of your life. Keep your eyes open, and your heart and soul too. Put your fear aside and just go for it! You only live once, and life is too short to miss out on love.
xoxoxoxox CC
Also, if you "do it" the first night you're not going to give too much thought about it. It's going to be raw and real- you know what you're getting! Now, if you wait, you have too much time to think about it. You're going to have preconceived notions about how it should be, where it should be, what you're going to wear, how you should do it, what you shouldn't do, are you too fat, too skinny, not in good enough shape, do you like him/her enough, or should you even do it at all! See what I'm saying? It's probably not going to be as good as if you would have just done it! So like Nike says-"Just Do It"!
And guys, don't be so quick to judge! Be happy you found a girl you're attracted to, and she actually wants you!!! That doesn't make her a slut or ho; She's no different than you. Girls want and need sex too!
My mom gave me the best advice, she said, "Be a lady in the street and a whore in the bedroom- and your man will be happy." :) So, be safe, have fun and happy dating. Hope you find the man or woman of your dreams, your soulmate, the love of your life. Keep your eyes open, and your heart and soul too. Put your fear aside and just go for it! You only live once, and life is too short to miss out on love.
xoxoxoxox CC
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Sexy Salsa Dancing
While the summer was winding down, another weekend was approaching. Things were going pretty good. I had got lucky on my birthday and won $600 on a slot machine the next day! I was on friendly talking terms with my ex, and my son was spending weekends with him and Bambi. I couldn't really complain much!
Earlier in the week, a friend from work, Eva, and our mutual friend Maria, invited me to join them at a Salsa dance party Saturday night. I said ok, probably, sure, why not...I honestly wasn't really looking forward to going, but, I had nothing better to do, so I said "what the hell"!
On Saturday I worked like usual, then went home to get ready. What would I wear? Salsa dancing required a skirit that moved and high heels. I put together an ensemble that worked, and when I was happy with the result, I took a deep breath and left to meet up with my group and get my cha cha cha on!
Eva brought her husband Dave who had gone out with us a few times before. I wispered in his ear that I thought we were the only white people there! Ok, other than the two blond bartenders, there were maybe a handful of caucasion people, everyone else was Hispanic.
I was a little uptight, and sterotypically ordered a margarita as my first drink. I crowded into the corner of the bar between my two friends. They were already moving to the beat of the music. We looked out onto the dance floor and saw Janet, a dance instructor who worked part-time with us. She was being spun and turned, and it looked oh so fun! I now ordered a chardonnay because of the beautiful glass they were serving it in, and it was too hot in there for red wine. I was now starting to loosen up. Shortly thereafter, I was out on the floor shaking my groove thing! The next thing I know, someone puts me in the front of a conga line. I'm pretty sure I stood out like a sore thumb; A strawberry blond in a seaful of burnets! When we headed back to the bar, I was so hot that I ordered a Corona with lime. Eva said to me, "I thought you said you didn't know how to Salsa dance?" I said, "I never said that!" Then a Latino man sent me a shot of tequilla. I asked one of the blond bartenders for salt and a lime. I did my shot like a pro! I licked salt from the back of my hand, downed my tequilla and bit into my lime. Then he grabbed me and took me to the dance floor. He spun me like I was on Dancing with the Stars! Somehow I was able to follow his lead, and look like I knew what I was doing! We ended the dance, and I thanked him. He spoke very little English. I rejoined my friends at the bar for a nightcap, as if I needed one more! So what started as a night I dreaded, ended up being a ton of fun! So hats off to trying new things- life is an adventure and fun is what you make it...
Earlier in the week, a friend from work, Eva, and our mutual friend Maria, invited me to join them at a Salsa dance party Saturday night. I said ok, probably, sure, why not...I honestly wasn't really looking forward to going, but, I had nothing better to do, so I said "what the hell"!
On Saturday I worked like usual, then went home to get ready. What would I wear? Salsa dancing required a skirit that moved and high heels. I put together an ensemble that worked, and when I was happy with the result, I took a deep breath and left to meet up with my group and get my cha cha cha on!
Eva brought her husband Dave who had gone out with us a few times before. I wispered in his ear that I thought we were the only white people there! Ok, other than the two blond bartenders, there were maybe a handful of caucasion people, everyone else was Hispanic.
I was a little uptight, and sterotypically ordered a margarita as my first drink. I crowded into the corner of the bar between my two friends. They were already moving to the beat of the music. We looked out onto the dance floor and saw Janet, a dance instructor who worked part-time with us. She was being spun and turned, and it looked oh so fun! I now ordered a chardonnay because of the beautiful glass they were serving it in, and it was too hot in there for red wine. I was now starting to loosen up. Shortly thereafter, I was out on the floor shaking my groove thing! The next thing I know, someone puts me in the front of a conga line. I'm pretty sure I stood out like a sore thumb; A strawberry blond in a seaful of burnets! When we headed back to the bar, I was so hot that I ordered a Corona with lime. Eva said to me, "I thought you said you didn't know how to Salsa dance?" I said, "I never said that!" Then a Latino man sent me a shot of tequilla. I asked one of the blond bartenders for salt and a lime. I did my shot like a pro! I licked salt from the back of my hand, downed my tequilla and bit into my lime. Then he grabbed me and took me to the dance floor. He spun me like I was on Dancing with the Stars! Somehow I was able to follow his lead, and look like I knew what I was doing! We ended the dance, and I thanked him. He spoke very little English. I rejoined my friends at the bar for a nightcap, as if I needed one more! So what started as a night I dreaded, ended up being a ton of fun! So hats off to trying new things- life is an adventure and fun is what you make it...
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
The Best Birthday (Sex) Ever!
The weekend of my bithday was approaching fast and I had high hopes it would be a good one! Of course I wasn't looking forward to becoming a year older, but that was actually pretty far back in my mind this year. I was feeling young, sexy and alive. I guess I have been kind of reliving my 20's, since that was the last time I was single, and only had that to go on as a reference. For the last 16 years I have only known what it is like to be a wife and a mother, as well as a daughter and sister, but to have a lover ot two, now that was something completly new!
Early in the week I had informed Steven that I would be coming to his bar with my friends to celebrate my birthday, and that "I was kinda hoping to go home with the owner!" He toyed with me, "You were hugh?"
On Friday night I had plans to go out with my mom and her friends and one of their daughters who was also celebrating her birthday that week, and was also newly seperated from her husband. We sang and danced, and drank and ate cake; And just had an all around good time, but I couldn't wait till Saturday night! I crashed out pretty early on my moms couch. When I woke up in the morning I had a happy birthday text from Steven. I went home and started to get ready for my real b'day celebration. I waas going to T's house first for dinner and drinks, with her and her husband, and two friends. The five of us finally managed to get to Stevens' bar at about 11pm. He was not there when we arrived because he had gone home to let the dog out, which he had called to let me know. T and I danced, and Stevens' partner made us a round of flaming drinks for my b'day. When Steven finally arrived, I turned left to T and right to Jan and said, "He's here". I saw him scan the room to look for me. A few minutes later he strolled by to say "hi". Shortly later I went over to talk to him. T came over and was pretty drunk by then and put her arms around him. I just laughed, knowing she meant no harm. In fact, she was so drunk she tipped over soon after, and we had to depart early. There was no way my night would end this way! I went over to Steven and told him to text me when he got home, that I would be waiting up for him! We all went back to T's house and I fell to sleep on the couch. For some strange reason I awoke in the middle of the night to find a text from Steven saying, "Honey, I'm home". I flew out of her house like a bat out of hell! I drove straight to his house. I texted him to say, "let me in, in 5 minutes", when I was close. It was about an hour after he texted me that I arrived. He was tired, and looked far from happy by the time I got there at almost 4am!; But it was my real birthday now, and nothing was going to ruin it; So I just curled up next to him and went to sleep.
In the morning I wanted to surprise him, and I made him breakfeast in his kitchen! There was an awkward moment when my ex texted me "Happy B'day", then he called me while I was there in the kitchen. (he had also left me a bottle of my favorite wine on my table at home). I spoke to him briefly and said "thanks".
Shortly thereafter I woke Steven with his breakfeast, and afterward asked for my birthday present! It was worth the wait! I was not disappointed. In fact, I finally got what I had been needing for a long time- if you know what I mean! We came at almost the same time, and I squeezed his hand so hard it must of hurt! My body was weak, and my birthday weekend was complete!
Early in the week I had informed Steven that I would be coming to his bar with my friends to celebrate my birthday, and that "I was kinda hoping to go home with the owner!" He toyed with me, "You were hugh?"
On Friday night I had plans to go out with my mom and her friends and one of their daughters who was also celebrating her birthday that week, and was also newly seperated from her husband. We sang and danced, and drank and ate cake; And just had an all around good time, but I couldn't wait till Saturday night! I crashed out pretty early on my moms couch. When I woke up in the morning I had a happy birthday text from Steven. I went home and started to get ready for my real b'day celebration. I waas going to T's house first for dinner and drinks, with her and her husband, and two friends. The five of us finally managed to get to Stevens' bar at about 11pm. He was not there when we arrived because he had gone home to let the dog out, which he had called to let me know. T and I danced, and Stevens' partner made us a round of flaming drinks for my b'day. When Steven finally arrived, I turned left to T and right to Jan and said, "He's here". I saw him scan the room to look for me. A few minutes later he strolled by to say "hi". Shortly later I went over to talk to him. T came over and was pretty drunk by then and put her arms around him. I just laughed, knowing she meant no harm. In fact, she was so drunk she tipped over soon after, and we had to depart early. There was no way my night would end this way! I went over to Steven and told him to text me when he got home, that I would be waiting up for him! We all went back to T's house and I fell to sleep on the couch. For some strange reason I awoke in the middle of the night to find a text from Steven saying, "Honey, I'm home". I flew out of her house like a bat out of hell! I drove straight to his house. I texted him to say, "let me in, in 5 minutes", when I was close. It was about an hour after he texted me that I arrived. He was tired, and looked far from happy by the time I got there at almost 4am!; But it was my real birthday now, and nothing was going to ruin it; So I just curled up next to him and went to sleep.
In the morning I wanted to surprise him, and I made him breakfeast in his kitchen! There was an awkward moment when my ex texted me "Happy B'day", then he called me while I was there in the kitchen. (he had also left me a bottle of my favorite wine on my table at home). I spoke to him briefly and said "thanks".
Shortly thereafter I woke Steven with his breakfeast, and afterward asked for my birthday present! It was worth the wait! I was not disappointed. In fact, I finally got what I had been needing for a long time- if you know what I mean! We came at almost the same time, and I squeezed his hand so hard it must of hurt! My body was weak, and my birthday weekend was complete!
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